Should You Take Revenge or Ownership?

In many of the situations we find ourselves in ( especially the painful ones), it's easy to assign roles: the victim and the villain.But is it always that black and white?

Or are there times when our own choices, boundaries, or lack of self-awareness kept us in environments that weren’t protecting us?

👉 It takes two to tango.

That doesn’t mean blame. It means responsibility.There’s a subtle but powerful difference between getting hurt and allowing certain patterns to keep hurting you.

Between being a victim of someone’s behavior and abandoning yourself in the process.

💬 Let’s break this down:

• You stayed in a relationship where your needs were consistently dismissed. Were you manipulated? Maybe. But did you also ignore red flags because you were afraid of being alone?

  
  

• Your colleague kept taking credit for your ideas. Did they cross a line? Absolutely. But did you speak up, or did fear of conflict keep you silent?

  
  

• A friend betrayed you. That hurts. But were there moments you felt something was “off” and still chose to give them the benefit of the doubt, again and again?

  
  

🧠 In those moments, we often seek revenge because it feels like reclaiming power.But power that comes from hurting someone else is still rooted in pain. It’s temporary. It's survival mode.

True healing comes from ownership.

Not theirs, but yours.

It’s the kind of ownership that says:“I can’t control how others behave, but I can choose how I respond. I can learn, strengthen my boundaries, and never abandon myself again.”

#MentalHealth #BrunPsychology #Ownership #SelfAwareness